Yes, I know. It has been a very long time since I've written my last entry. There is really so much to tell.
First and foremost, I am a firm believer, whether it's God's doing or our doing, everything in life happens for a reason. Secondly, if you say that you're a follower of Christ, then one should listen to what He says and act out of the inspiration of desperation. Just because an opportunity presents itself does not mean that it's from God! Thirdly, if you called to be a leader, then you must have a shepherd's heart! I know that everyone is flawed and the bible says that "...love covers a multitude of sins." However, constantly making excuses of leadership using spiritual manipulation to control the membership of the church and a leader asking a member to use their name and credit for a bill(s) that's suppose to be for the church and NOT put it under the church's name...well...that kind of "love" is NOT worth me going to hell over! Finally, there is a major difference between a church and a cult! If GOD gives us free will, so should a CHURCH! But I digress...
One of the greatest lessons I've learned from my experience is to keep my personal life separate from the church. I find that some leaders tends to throw your past or things that God has delivered you from back in your face. That is not of God! Also, never....and I mean never have your pastor as your landlord! You are just asking for trouble!
Now that I am at an undisclosed location, what I really need from the Lord right now is to be healed, set free and delivered completely! I want no trace of bitterness, anger and resentment to be left in me from all that I've endured. I need God to heal my broken heart and stand firm in Him. I am a victor, not a victim! This experience has nearly broke me, but nevertheless I stood firm in God! Now I need to exhale...and let it go!
Until next time...
