Saturday, April 18, 2009

I'm So Done! - Chapter 9

2009 has been a rough year so far. Between my mom being sick for over 3 months, going to school – only to drop-out, people at my job stressing me out, some members of my family being just down-right psychotic in their behavior, and my own health is in question, it is only by the grace of God that I’m still sane!

I can’t help but wonder if God is punishing me for all the turmoil I’m going through!

I feel completely numb! I’m sitting here at work contemplating if I want to return or not. I have a MRI appointment on Monday. The technician will scan my brain and I’m afraid of the worst. All of weight I’ve lost I’ve gained back – and then some. I gave up hope on ever being married.

The bottom line is this – I’m 36 years old, single, no children (not that I want any), no property, a damn assistant (not a manager, not a director, but an assistant!), with nothing to call my own! A dream that hasn’t been fulfilled and I constantly suffer because of my calling!

This will be my last entry for a while. I give up….I’m done!

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Is it just me? - Chapter 8

Is it just me, or that pastors, preachers and other leaders have taken God out of the picture?

Please understand, we are all human and none of us are perfect, but leaders in ministry are set apart and are suppose to set an example on how to handle situations God's way.  From what I have seen, it is the reason why I'm not ready to be a leader!  My motto is if you're gonna speak about it, then be about it!  That's the code I live by!

I am truly disappointed in what I have seen and experience with church leaders and I pray that we ALL have a humble experience with the Lord and I also pray that we FINALLY get it together with Christ & be a better example for the unbelievers to come to Christ!

Until next time....